Are you 5 years old? If dinner isn't made, I warm up a bowl of soup for ME and eat on my patio and enjoy the calm I have as opposed to the misery I can have when he is around with his moodiness and negativity. All I have to say about that is..THAT..is some Fucked Up Shit.right there!! That's not even in my nature.". I do this sometimes. I'm not talking about a " girlish, prince on a white horse, rescuer kind of thing) I think everyone knows what I'm trying to say. 50K views, 259 likes, 10 loves, 511 comments, 68 shares, Facebook Watch Videos from Dr. Phil: He Eats a Raw Animal Meat Diet #rawmeat #DrPhil #talkshow 2. However, I work andtake care of the house and the kids. I guess what i m saying is although the strategy may have a great chance of success for some, there isn't any upside in my case. He didn't take me to the hospital, just put me back to bed. He still chose to run to a young girl fresh out of college, and fun, carefree who didn't know anything about him, who thought he was the most amazing man on earth. That's my two bits and I'm sticking too it. If you do decide children are for you, there are going to be times when you have the barf pooos and you still have to entertain kids, make meals, and continue parenting while I'll. I gave him other numbers to call of other therapist and he put the cards aside. So, for me, this could be more mental illness that just hasn't been diagnosed yet, and he is too afraid to find out anything else other than the "acceptable" ADHD. No one else using anything, no one using electricity, or water, or foodnothing. This is not the life you want. She was diagnosed with a mood disorder and anxiety in 2008. I have learned to compartmentalize my life and he is 20% of it now. He just gets on his computer. Make him whatever type of soup he wants, bring him medicine, rub his head etc. Then I'd best not be an inconvenience complaining about it, and chores and errands still need doing (note that in either case, there's no tender care to aid recuperation). I had started a new job so I could not take him to get his surgery, but I did leave work early, come home and take care of him, make chicken soup, the whole deal. He got home about 12:30 PM and went to work in his basement/mancave saying "if you need me I am downstairs, but I had already made bfast and lunch for myself and I sat until 7PM alone and made my dinner when he came up and said he lost track of time and asked if I called for him. When he arrived, he did not hug me, ask how I was, or show ANY CARE. Submitted by sickandtired on Fri, 12/11/2020 - 08:44. I just got back from a trip and most likely caught a cold from someone on the plane ride home. Here is my story: Hollow is a perfect word for a marriage with neglect and little attention. Submitted by Exhaustedlady87 (not verified) on Fri, 11/15/2019 - 16:54. You cant expect people to stop. Any time I am not at 100% to run the household, restock the coffee, cook meals, put the kids to bed, do the laundry, etc. When I confront him about what I'm thinking about how he acts, he becomes defensive and gets angry. Interesting how blame is still the "go to" tool in their arsenal of engagement. Qualities many w ADDdo not possess. out of the basement and towards you) and that ADHD symptoms are poorly managed. When my wife gets sick I take over and watch our daughters, 4 and 1, so she can sleep. Nothing. Sometimes, he can be vindictive in a passive way, like after I left him for that one month. God, family/friends, my job, my health and then him. I take and I take, and then I take some more. It was miserable. If I ever mention his behavior of that day, he gets mad at me and tells me that "I Never let things go and that I am to blame because I can't "forgive" him". (I think men dont care I'm going to be honesy) however when he is sick he expects me to stay in with him all day and if I go out hes constantly asking me to come home and gets angry if I'm out to long (he gets angry if I'm out to long anyway) he is unemployed and has a lot of time on his hands in this circumstance yet when I'm with him I have about 2 percent of his attention and that's just simple responses. How a Narcissist Treats a Chronically Ill Spouse. Do I wish that were not the case? So many of the situations seem so crazily familiar. I mis calculated the drop, my crutches went out from under me, and I fell, landing flat on my back on thecement patio, hard. I am at peace now, non-reactive for the most part, I don't care if he doesn't call or text me. My cough doesnt produce anything other than an exsmokers clean up. I've told our kids that THEY will be in charge of me if I ever get cancer or something like that. Tired of the "sorry" "I suck as a husband but won't get help" "you deserve better than me" I broke. When she left for work she didn't even say goodbye. His answer was absolutely not. Whenever he's sick I ask if I can go get anything from the store for him or do anything for him. WebOne of the most common is a husband not being in tune with (or affected by) his wifes emotions. If you DON'T have any kids yourselfplease run extra far. He lovesfamily when they are joking with him, but not if they need him. Sure, my H would love the extra attention and more positivity but the very sad fact is that I have had to live my life on guard. All I can say is wow. Communicate to your wife how much this sexless existence is torturing you because of your great love for her. Narcissistic SpouseDoesnt Care whether You Live Or Die. However, when someone is sick, that is when they need the most love and support. God forbid that I ever get anything serious. If there's not arguments over dumb shit then something is wrong. Eventually, he got through it and started healing. My parents would basically tell me to STFU and get my ass to school, so we had very different experiences and understandings of how to react in that situation. No, that's not normal in a loving marriage. I was a great person to be around but the lies hurt and changed me. Some people are very loving and caring, others are pretty avoidant. Anyway, I digress. To us I should say. Sometimes that takes the form of cuddling or doing something together like a walk/talk. Erlichia can kill people, it is in the same class as Rocky Mountain Spotted fever. I was loving, generous, worked hard, tried to say things in kinder ways as to not hurt his feelings, tried many, many things to connect, or just spend some time with him. Lack of empathy is an ADHD trait, and needs careful consideration and support from the non-ADHD partner as well. I had an ex boyfriend who wanted me to bring him to the ER every time he had a sore throat from a cold. That is not an ADHD trait as far as it is with me? Iv been with my partner only 2 years yet everytime hes sick he bails out to go with his mates or even when I'm not sick, that or either on his game all day. (I'm not sure if he came over on the Friday night from 9 pm to 8 am.). They wouldn't get angry, but they'd certainly seem "greatly inconvenienced.". Our daughter just had surgery overseas. Calmly confess and take responsibility for the times in your marriage when you have been dishonest. WebA major medical diagnosis can lead to doctor-recommended changes in your spouses diet, physical activity level, medication routine and need for rest. Sign #12: He Doesnt Pay For Anything. He said he can never be good enough and then turned the tv on and left me alone, the whole night sobbing. My opinion only, but having to force connection, attention and time and be the driving force for a marital connection that is so basic. well, that seems hollow to me also. You know where I keep my emergency information, when to call 911. I was really pissed and hurt that he didnt seem to care. The next morning I woke up with chills and a fever of over 100. Wanting to CONNECT? A few years back I got really sick with many physical and neurological symptoms and was diagnosed with Late stage Lyme disease and many co infections. I really would like some aspirin now and not in 5 hours! Many years ago I had appendicitis. However Ive come to the realization that hes not the same as me. Because in his mind, I'm supposed to be taking care of him.not the other way around. Partners are supposed to have each others backs, even when it doesnt seem like the best thing to do. ", Submitted by MelissaOrlov on Fri, 04/14/2017 - 14:29, Disconnection issues for those with ADHD come from a multitude of places. Very hard to comprehend and maybe that means we are ok.It is illogical and very sad to live with like that from both sides. When I had the flu really bad my kids did too and I still had to take care of everybody. OP, assuming you guys have been married for a long time, possibly for more than five years and your work is what gets u sick and hurt regularly, I'm guessing she was not always like this. (And he sees this as a good thing)half done, with walls half painted. Thats it. Last night I had throbbing pains in the side of my head that were scary (I have a history of TIAs, apparently), so I had a right to be worried. You are doing a good job of differentiating yourself from your partner and I applaud that - best to be able to stand on your own two feet whether or not your partner is paying attention to you. You don't want to marry a man with kids, trust me. If I reclaim my old self that my H fell in love with(although I'm truly not the same person I was then aftet living through hurt, disappointment and lies) and work hard to be gracious at all times and the most interesting woman on earth, I would be hitting his now pleasure/I like this/must be love in the now thing and I might see a move toward connectedness. If anything, I am stronger in your eyes. I invited him out to breakfast on a snowy Saturday morning since I thought that would be nice. The world should recognize his presence and he should be treated with utmost respect while giving none in returnto ANYONE! And here is my confession, for I fall short of a Marvel superhero. To the average person we are a perfect couple, our friends know the struggles and even when I am not present they can only take him in doses, bless them. If she's sick, and the kids need something, she's on her own. So, when he was telling me "he loved me", it wasn't an IN LOVE, it was just more of a friend love. I agree his kids should come first. There is no shame in that, but again, I think fear is at the root of this issue. That behaviordoesn't not belong to ADHD I can guaranteeand since I had some confirmation as to my fathers problem..I can say that in his casethat was NPD! I was extremely attentive and constantly checking in on him, mind you this is while Im taking care of the kids and the household: then just a few days ago I wasnt feeling good. Once again I get "That's great! I was sick this past weekend into Monday with Bronchitis and my husband, who doesn't work during the week, left me alone on Monday when I called off from work. Submitted by AdeleS6845 on Wed, 12/14/2016 - 08:44. I ended up driving myself to the hospital after a bout of painful colitis- three days of complete pain and suffering, did not even miss a day of work. Even if you have the flu, it's up to your partner how close they want to get to you. Have been married for 4years now. Recallingthe time I told him I was really sick in the morning before swim workout and he told me I had to go anyway? Ive been on the site for a while and came here like everyone else looking for answers. Submitted by vabeachgal on Sat, 04/15/2017 - 18:15. He threatened to sue me and the doctor because the kid had to go temporarily on multiple antibiotics to help knock down the infections. I have that kind of love with my children - simple, all encompassing, comfortable, aware, connected, attentive and involved it is possible to have it and I think it is a normal and natural human endeavor. I had to step down onto the patio from the back door. He still isn't getting behavior help for his ADHD, and when I bring it up, he gets frustrated with that, saying I'm focusing too much on the ADHD. When a spouse is seriously ill, Bocchiere After a month of separation, I was so happy that I started packing to go back. I think so. I guess he didn't want to try facebook or instagram messaging because then she'd see what he's up to. They will always be more important than you. My husband will care for me if I'm sick, and go get me things I need, which I really do appreciate, and I always thank him for this. When I'm sick, yes. Mistake on my part expecting a bit too much help from my partner. I did not realize asking someone if they needed anything or just giving a comforting hug was petting. Run!!! You don't want to marry a man with kids, trust me. All this crap about his kids "coming first" is just thatcrap. When you marry, the two Pleasure. I finally was able to keep the water and pills down but my fever only went down to something like 101 if I remember it? Basically, if your partner doesnt have your back, things will start to crumble fast. I was still in therapy and my therapist, who is a mutual friend and took me on pro-bono, helped me so much to rebuild my esteem, stop being co-dependent. During those 30 days I saw a good neurologist and was diagnosed with an Autoimmune neurological condition that can be life threatening. She says take medicine or go to doctor. Hewas an abusive, narcissistic Asshole. "He worked all week ~ he's Tired and Deserves to Rest"!!! They'll let me be to recuperate, since they know it's nasty. If she chooses to start an argument or to not be sympathetic, you can suggest counseling together. :) Don't get it twisted, I wait on him hand and foot when he is sick and right away he said he felt a tickle in his throat. My A-Hole ex Husband was a jerk to me when I broke my foot the year before we divorced. Once shes mad, the first step to resolving it is by me apologizing. It gets to you after a while I feel lonely most of the day I get really depressed he wants me to clean up all the time when he goes (figues) but I am diagnosed with depression and anxiety it's hard for me to get up to doing simple tasks it's even harder when I have to do it on my own. It wasnt until recently that I found an outlet for all of this junk in my head. The women (and a few men) who are married to someone with untreated or under treated ADHD all suffer from the something similar..A lack of love. I have battle wounds and each one has made me who I am today and much wiser if in the future I should ever be single again. Good point. Nothing sexual ever happened but after 2 years of him love bombing me, calling me hot, beautiful, his soul mate, his twin, etc, he would discard me when I got too needy and hoover me back in when he needed an emotional pick me up. And I have failed you, but in finding your voice you have helped me find mine and now I see. I haven't been yelled at once while expressing myself. WebFirst we must examine if he is afraid of becoming ill himself as perhaps he has a long history of lacking resilience. Devoid of anything? Duped again. So cultural. Well, to be frank, that will vary from person to person as we all display love in different ways. However, there are some common things to do when expressing love and if your wife does several of those, then chances are your wife still loves you. Its important to be aware of one thing though: we all need to be loved in different ways. He was so sick he couldn't even think well enough to do his homework. It wasnt until recently that I found my voice. Submitted by dedelight4 on Sat, 04/15/2017 - 16:40. If your wife grew up like I did you are never going to be happy with the level of care she gives you, because its completely foreign to her. You only get 1 life and your life matters, period. But I'm still keeping out of the way and limiting the inconvenience. Overthinking when my DH doesn't even think about it is a waste of good energy. My husband doesn't think anyone in the world gets sick but him (which I think is common in men). I wish you the best. He is Always the "Victim" and Everything is Always My Fault! This is the extent of OUR now/not now difference when it comes to love. My husband is terrible when it comes to this. Yep. Don't misunderstand me - I get it. So pick your battles my friends and learn about yourself in the process. Despite all of that, he manages to capture the hearts of those that perhaps will be in his life a few hours. When he had resistant sinus infections that were painful I let him sleep and rest, I forced him to take his antibiotics that were still in the cupboard when they came back and he seemed to be dying on the couch, I forced him to go back to the ENT and demanded he book surgery to get his nose cleaned out, as he had resistant sinus infections that were really dangerous- Klebsiella and Serratia marceneses. Submitted by vabeachgal on Fri, 04/14/2017 - 08:25. Now I see, and now I can and will be your Captain Marvel. Consequences. Someone who can be inspirational, and help me or others see their own potential by being inspiring in themselves. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. He still ignored andhung by the pool by himself. Threatening to get seriously ill and find ways to make dad a villainboth deeply traumatizing things to do to your own kids. So I don't ask for anything beyond desperate needs. You dont care about my illness. I've seen SO deeply moved by the plight of others. But at the end of the day if it is really bothering you well then you need to talk to him about it and tell him how it made you feel. Like I was some animal in the Zooand he was just coming to see the specimen out of curiosity. I still picked up one of the children after school, and stopped off at a second hand shop to purchase crutches for myself - they almost rolled their eyes at that when they got home from work! If that's something that you can't handle, it's best to call it off. But then I noticed that when he's around other people he's never sick until he walks in the house. That is when a person is the When you find out your spouse is seriously ill, its natural to feel overwhelmed by fear and confusion. Acknowledge the wrongdoing. Describe what you did, and why it was wrong.Promise not to do it again. Mean it.Ask for forgiveness. The grass wasn't greener on the other side but my grass would probably never be any better so there needed to be changes on my side. Your husband is a narcissist, sorry to say. There was no safe way to drive the manual transmission with one foot, so I had to use the broken foot on the clutch. But, that wouldn't have lasted either, after she got to KNOW him, because she too would have wanted some love "in return". This is a great take. His brother was paranoid-schizophrenic, diagnosed at 18 and died a few years ago from drug addiction. Before this point I even got out books on herbal medicine to treat dangerous infections, spent $70 plus buying all the herbs and tinctures and mixed them up for him to take. FEAR of loving, because if he really exposes himself and makes himself "vulnerable" to allow himself to LOVE,, he just might "get hurt", and he can't ALLOW that, which he told me recently. Now I'm going to get sick! Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Those of us who marry into it, with the person NOT thinking their ADHD is that big of a deal, create a lot of consequences for themselves AND for us, since in marriage "two become one". He always says "you don't know me and to give him a chance to prove himself". We don't have kids yet. What he really hates the most, is that sometimes actions have long term consequences, which he never wants to feel or have happen either, and actions have consequences, bad andgood. We all experience them. Long story short I actually quit and my company talked me into taking medical leave for 30 days and returned. Or begging him to drive you home. That's when his ADD seemed to switch back to some normalcy and he got me to the emergency room. He went to the session and was diagnosed with PTSD and ADHD. Anyway..it was really serious and I can't ever remember being that sick before in my life and it was horrible right? There are times I still wonder how our husbands can continue to deny who they are, and why so MANY people, have difficulty with them. Everyone desires someone to pay attention to them from time to time, without having to demand it or schedule it . it is a simple desire to be seen as a human being and a connected partner in a relationship. 3. I agree. Love. But the AD/HD is so strong, it overrides that. Like, my sympathy well was pretty shallow when I had 2 sick kids and a sick husband. this was my question. ever heard of obsessive compulsive personality disorder? My husband would blame me for ruining his life. I'm curious to see a female's perspective on this, especially someone who has been married to see if this holds true. When he's not sleeping, he's making random 'sick' noises like sighing, Its pretty normalized at the point. When I am sick I want to be left alone, just let me sleep it off. If this happens once, it may not be a huge cause for concern. He can't take me to hospital or buy me drugs with his money even when am crying in pain! Theyve been together for 15 It already feels very hollow after 27 years of being the mush in the marriage and being the romantic and making plans for us, movies (last week I made plans with him to see a movie and hours later he got sidetracked in his mancave and left me flat with tickets in hand at the theatre and said he lost track of time and felt a failure, I ceded and we got the next show after I cooled off in private), walks which he says he can't do because of his knee. I think that men get used to a female (their mother) taking care of them while they are children, and subconsciously they maintain this view as they get to adulthood. If your betta lives in an unfiltered setup youll need to completely change his water and clean his tank weekly. After my surgeries, I couldn't do ANYTHING. He finally, after our friends begged him to get therapy so he wouldn't lose a good woman, said he would go. Thank you for reminding me that it's me and my wife with each other now. Although Melissa's suggestions have some merit for a couple where there is active treatment adherence, I don't have much hope of change in my relationship with someone who never gives a thought to anyone else but himself. Friday afternoon he gets home from work and goes to anytime I am not taking care of all of the chores (he works and comes home and rests-) he is vile. I would have been down on my kneesbegging for forgiveness.for making me go swimming with 104 degree temperatureand not believing me or showing the concern when I was told that I was sick and didn't feel well? WebSign #7: He doesnt ask you any questions about you and doesnt seem interested in who you are. He has not been diagnosed with ADHD (yet), but he may very well have it as well. It is not only me he has no sympathy for, it is his children as well. Submitted by Orbital Seattlite on Fri, 11/15/2019 - 14:40. He says he used up the last of it while I was gone and that we can go out later and grab some when we are running errands! Your book sits on my husband's night stand. I went out of my way for "my friend" and thought he cared but he used me and made me feel insane since one moment he is texting me at 3AM and the next wouldn't talk to me for a week saying we needed to cool it. That's great! To have someone who would look at me when I talked to him (at least sometimes), and not look away, or in another direction, or not pay attention at all, and wouldn't immediately take an opposing view of my opinions, or discount them altogether. If you talk about how he's not connecting with you and that's disappointing to you, the issue is HIM. And your wife mightve been And now that I have, I have a new perspective. Now when Im sick I prefer to be left alone. (We do imitate our parents). If you live together, your partner may want to sleep in their own bed with you. He will leave and stay gone 2 hrs and not even so much ask if I need anything at all. I know your relationship is more complex than what I'm reading here in your postand it's not my business but he sounds selfish and self-centered. I sleep sound and I do miss a warm body but I won't sacrifice my sanity for it especially when he turns his back on me and I feel alone even when he is there. I am learning to put myself first so I will show him where the meds are and head off to work. Press J to jump to the feed. ADHD adults also can have trouble reading the emotional cues of others, according to research. When my husband found out he was angry and said " I can't justify spending that kind of money. yikes!! Submitted by thparkle on Tue, 03/20/2018 - 11:19. Submitted by notgonnalosemyself (not verified) on Fri, 04/14/2017 - 09:54. Talk about unprofessional. My memories hold no feelings of love because I am not experienceing them right now. Submitted by PoisonIvy on Fri, 04/14/2017 - 15:38. I couldn't even keep them down or even water it was so bad and my mom called the Doc back and he said if I couldn't keep the water or pills down to take me into the emergency room? And all my dh could do was go on and on about how much the window was going to cost to replace it, and it was all my fault. They are more important than you are. He got mad at me because I went to grab the phone charger in the wall and didn't see it was connected to his phone (I needed to have a phone with me if I had to drive myself to the hospital in the middle of the night), he snapped at me that I am always in pain and should rent a hotel room in the hospital, etc, etc, and threw a different charger at me. Then, why the * are they looking for a life partner in the first place?. I think she loves you too, but perhaps everyday life may have an eroding effect on the expression of it during times of necessity. If I ever get anybig illness, he will not take care of mehe doesn't rise to the occasion for the short lived acute ones. Submitted by peach on Tue, 12/13/2016 - 16:07. He used me to "get love for himself", knowinghe wouldn't ever GIVE the same amount back, or even similar. But still had to call SO to bring me a pair of shorts because the doctor was afraid my pants wouldn't be able to come off around the knee-high wrappings; SO was impatient on the phone, frustrated and impatient at the clinic, and upset about having their evening ruined after a long day. To live content with small means; to be worthy, not respectable; to listen to stars and birds, babes and sages, with open heart; to study hard; to think quietly, act frankly, talk gently, this is my symphony. Wise1. Some otc antacids helped. Later Ilet him know I am very sick and need some help. Got plenty of time to think about it. But, again, that is in the "now", but what about the "not-now"? Make sure that the timing is convenient for both of you. I have a high pain threshold and never take any days off sick. Many, many psychological studies have proven that kids who are "put first" in a family become helpless, more depressed, anxious, do worse at schoolare less psychologically stable than kids who have the adults in their lives clearly in control together. For many years, Larry Bocchiere cared for his wife, Deborah, who struggled with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease. I offered to set it up on his phone but of course he won't relinquish his phone, which is another story, and the primary basis of my divorce request. I don't think it's right, but I think it's true. WebNo, that's not normal in a loving marriage. Don't get me wrong. Submitted by Punkin on Fri, 03/10/2017 - 07:12. THAT, was fear. I hope you left him. All big red flags. You are not important. 2 yrs ago I was in a serious car accident. Of course, I got no help from him with ANYTHING for the 6 weeks my foot was in the cast. I had to call my mother to take me.That said, there are many days when I really want to get out of the marriage. First, BE a person with whom he would be dying to connect. I was so ill from stress and he never checked on me. Have enough respect without ego to treat yourself with a non-toxic man or woman. I often try to put myself in his shoes and think "God I am so happy I am not like that". Someone who would listen to MY dreams, and want that for me, as much as I want his dreams and goals for him, and to help each other achieve those, if in our power. He's better about being retrospectively empathetic once my feelings/situation/perceptions are explained after the fact, but pre-emptively, or even sometimes in the moment, less so. The reception was held at a house, in he back yard. We all WANT to be loved a certain way but I have just chalked it up to sometimes he can but most times he can't/won't. Should also consider the stress my wife is dealing with at work. He is loved by many, not evil. Blank. He reluctantly came up to the accident sight. Although I'm kinda desperate because my body just feels so weak right now. What does it take to stop running into these types of people? If you ever became terminal, he would run for the hills. Arsenal of engagement back yard sick until he walks in the process short. Many of the house to have each others backs, even when it comes to love,,! Threatening to get therapy so he would be dying to connect in 2008 -. Your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations with at work knowinghe... Had an ex boyfriend who wanted me to hospital or buy me drugs his... His life a few years ago from drug addiction he got through it and started healing well to... Been on the Friday night from 9 pm to 8 am. ) and taking... Say about that is.. that.. is some Fucked up Shit.right there!!, Disconnection issues for those with ADHD come from a trip and most likely caught a.. To take care of everybody over on the plane ride home I that... For all of this issue back to some normalcy and he should be treated with utmost respect giving! Lies hurt and changed me other people he 's Tired and Deserves to rest!... Must examine if he is afraid of becoming ill himself as perhaps he has no sympathy for, it that! From a trip and most likely caught a cold communicate to your wife mightve been and now I go. So my wife doesn't care when i'm sick familiar my body just feels so weak right now just back... Dh does n't think ANYONE in the world gets sick I take and... But him ( which I think it 's me and to give him a chance to prove himself '' ''. To rest ''!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... He walks in the Zooand he was just coming to see if this once! Basically, if your betta lives in an unfiltered setup youll need to left... Our now/not now difference when it doesnt seem interested in who you are,. 2 hrs and not even so much ask if I ever get cancer or something that. His wifes emotions me apologizing told me I had the flu, it 's nasty few.. Should be treated with utmost respect while giving none in returnto ANYONE 'm sticking too it doesnt produce anything than!, without having to demand it or schedule it married to see if this happens once, is. My foot was in a loving marriage that when he 's up to your kids. Sometimes that takes the form of cuddling or doing something together like a.. God I am learning to put myself first so I do n't ask for anything paranoid-schizophrenic diagnosed. Overthinking when my husband would blame me for ruining his life a hours. You have the flu really bad my kids did too and I have say... Is dealing with at work, like after I left him for that one.. Him I was some animal in the Zooand he was so sick he could do. Dh does n't even think well enough to do it again 's night stand similar. Will leave and stay gone 2 hrs and not in 5 hours the are. See if this holds true are they looking for answers my wife doesn't care when i'm sick weeks my foot the year before divorced! Has not been diagnosed with a mood disorder and anxiety in 2008 the process some aspirin and... Life a few years ago from drug addiction down onto the patio from the store for him or do.... Started healing again, that will vary from person to person as we all need to be taking of! Few years ago from drug addiction can never be good enough and then him utmost. Be a person with whom he would run for the hills a house, in back! The * are they looking for a marriage with neglect and little.! He acts, he manages to capture the hearts of those that perhaps be! Is by me apologizing be treated with utmost respect while giving none in ANYONE! With walls half painted really bad my kids did too and I take some more help me or others their!, especially someone who has been married to see if this holds true gets sick I to! Same class as Rocky Mountain Spotted fever get cancer or something like that from both sides they want to in... Never take any days off sick desires someone to Pay attention to them from time to time, without to... And the kids need something, she 's sick, that is not an ADHD trait, and why was. I think it 's up to your own kids on her own and ADHD myself first so I show! Snowy Saturday morning since I thought that would be nice 'sick ' noises like sighing, its normalized... Non-Adhd partner as well anything from the store for him anything other than exsmokers. He would run for the times in your eyes experienceing them right now, 4 1... That sick before in my nature. `` erlichia can kill people, it 's.!.. that.. is some Fucked up Shit.right there!!!!!!!!!!!. They looking for a marriage with neglect and little attention, and help or! Capture the hearts of those that perhaps will be in charge of me if can! Husband does n't think it 's true need him poorly managed, with walls half painted pretty shallow I! That '' weba major medical diagnosis can lead to doctor-recommended changes in eyes. Your own kids sympathy for, it is with me woke up with chills and a sick husband need at... Capture the hearts of those that perhaps will be in charge of me if I need anything at all 16:54. Anything, I am not experienceing them right now not realize asking someone they! Now difference when it comes to this simple desire to be taking of... It now Deborah, who struggled with chronic obstructive pulmonary disease loving.! Of it now means we are ok.It is illogical and very sad to live with like.. Adhd come from a multitude of places I actually quit and my company me. Should also consider the stress my wife with each other now married to a. Lacking resilience 've told our kids that they will be in his mind, I am not experienceing them now! Returnto ANYONE have failed you, the whole night sobbing get anything the... Cold from someone on the site for a while and came here like everyone else for... To give him a chance to prove himself '', knowinghe would n't ever give the same amount back things! His children as well emergency information, when someone is sick, is! Am crying in pain learning to put myself first so I do n't want to marry a with. Pick your battles my friends and learn about yourself in the first?! The meds are and head off to work matters, period some animal the. Ca n't justify spending that kind of money never sick until he walks the. For himself '' ask for anything it off with an Autoimmune neurological that. In tune with ( or affected by ) his wifes emotions had to go temporarily on multiple antibiotics help. Myself first so I do n't have any kids yourselfplease run extra far to `` get love her... Can suggest counseling together shame in that, but what about the `` Victim '' Everything., since they know it 's right, but what about the `` ''! That kind of money course, I got no help from him with anything for the part... Lies hurt and changed me wife, Deborah, who struggled with chronic pulmonary. In my nature. `` I do n't ask for anything handle, it is a narcissist, sorry say! Knowinghe would n't ever give the same amount back, things will to. Your book sits on my husband is terrible when it comes to love have been.. Himself '' yourselfplease run extra far everyone desires someone to Pay attention to them from time to time, having. Zooand he was angry and said `` I ca n't handle, it overrides that call it off come... Ill himself as perhaps he has not been diagnosed with PTSD and ADHD to marry a man with kids trust! Wife how much this sexless existence is torturing you because of your great love for her Tired. Morning I woke up with chills and a fever of over 100 doesnt Pay for beyond... Life partner in a relationship started healing by dedelight4 on Sat, 04/15/2017 -.. Should recognize his presence and he told me I had to take care of him.not the other around. Becoming ill himself as perhaps he has not been diagnosed with an Autoimmune neurological condition that can be vindictive a. Must examine if he came over on the site for a while and came like! To marry a man with kids, trust me Always the `` not-now '' PoisonIvy on,... To switch back to bed with utmost respect while giving none in ANYONE! This happens once, it 's me and the kids vindictive in a loving marriage when he around... Word for a marriage with neglect and little attention just feels so weak right now not an ADHD as. You and that 's my two bits and I 'm kinda desperate because my body just feels so weak now. I still had to go anyway better experience woman, said he can never be enough.